The Importance of Understanding

I got a full nights sleep!!!  Its amazing how much better and brighter the day is when you get a straight eight hours sleep with no interruptions, no little feet dancing in the bed, no elbows or extra limbs (you know our kiddies grow an extra set of legs and arms when the lights go out... well it feels that way when you are getting the autie or aspie version of Riverdance on your back or head during the wee hours!)

I had become increasingly frustrated lately as every time Munchkin slept in her dads house, he would report that she had no problems sleeping and made me question even more my own parenting skills.  I wondered it if was the double bed she gets to sleep in that helped her settle well there. Or the fact that he marches her up mountains and they are constantly on the go when she's there so was tired out.  I racked my brains and though that if I did the same, she may sleep here.  I dragged her to the beach, the forest, marathon trampoline sessions or if it rained, the bed in the spare room had its strength seriously tested.  But no, like every other night, she resisted sleep til gone midnight.  Things marginally improved after I was given a prescription for Melatonin from the paediatrician during her review and I could get her to bed 9.30ish each night but she never stayed asleep.

It was only after her recent OT assessment that it was explained to me that Munchkin wasn't actually kicking me or hitting me but sensory seeking by pressing her feet and limbs up against me.  Its very common with kids with proprioceptive problems.  She constantly seeks input to gauge her position by pressing up against me over and over during the night. Once I knew why she did this, it actually didn't bother me as much anymore.  Its amazing what a dash of understanding can add to the mix!  She used to only sleep as a baby if my arm was across her chest (not my hand, just my forearm) and the OT recommended that I use a weighted blanket in the report I received the other day.  It was only then that things fell into place regarding her sleeping pattern at her dads.  While explaining the report to him, he informed me that he uses two duvets and a blanket at his house as he didn't want her to be cold and he couldn't afford to use the heating.  She was getting the equivalent of a weighted blanket while there!  With this new information, I set to work that night.  I got a heavier duvet and stuffed it into her single cover. I put a bed rail up, as the OT explained that even though she doesn't fall out of bed, she would be subconsciously checking her proximity to the edge.  I put her to bed and waited for the magic to happen....

3am and there is screeching at the stairgate in her room... I go to the room to see that she has stripped off earlier in the night as dirtied her nappy and got back into bed.  She's then wet the bed so that was the end of that attempt!  I had thought we'd got past the stripping off in bed stage but will have to break out the Houdini suits again.

Last night we tried again.  On of the facebook mums suggested a duvet under her also so I set up the bed.  One duvet under her, a feather and down pillow and a doubled up duvet on top of her. She's in her Houdini suit so we're good to go.  4 mg Melatonin and some milk and lets see what happened.  I sneaked back up ten minutes later to check on her and.......

She may be holding onto the wall and rail but she looks so snug in her cocoon!  And yes, amazingly, she stayed there all night :D   I have fingers, toes and eyes crossed that it continues to work as I feel like a different person today.  If not, I may have to reconsider the duct tape and staples solution... (relax, I'm only joking so take your finger off the speed dial to the social workers hehe)

What's Sleep Got To Do With It??

"When I was a child I used to hate going to bed... Now I cherish every hour of sleep!"

I saw this posted up on Facebook earlier and I couldn't help but physically nod in agreement as I read it.  Sleep... its something we all need in order to survive and keep our mental faculties intact.  Unfortunately Munchkin doesn't realise that!  She's never been a great sleeper from the start, often waking three or four times a night and ending up in bed beside me, as it would be the only way I could get one eye shut if not two.  In the early days, while she was still a baby, I accepted that there would be some degree of sleep deprivation involved as with all babies... (you can spot a sleep deprived mother a mile off, with the telltale black bags, and I'm not talking Prada dahling!) Thats what babies do... they eat, poop, sleep and cry and repeat this cycle over and over.  Usually though, sometime midway throughout their first year of life, they will eventually settle into a sleep pattern, waking less and ending up sleeping their 12-13 hours straight through to morning by about a year...

Unfortunately, with Munchkin, and with many other children I know on the spectrum, sleep deprivation is more common than sleep.  For some reason, our kiddies need so much less sleep than other kids their age.  I occasionally get lulled into a false sense of security when my pixie decides to toe the line and give me a night or two in a row, making me believe that perhaps the torture of the night time waking is actually ending.... But no!  Bam, we're back at square one :(  I do hold onto some hope though... Her older sister woke every night until she was over 4 so maybe, just maybe....

The effects of this broken sleep don't appear evident in Munchkin, who can happily run around, and laugh and smile etc as if she's had a 12 hour marathon kip.  Nothing seems to knock her off kilter.  She does her puzzles, plays with the toys, does her tablework without fuss and stays in relatively good form during her sessions in school and with tutors.  So why is there a problem I hear you ask....

I guess the problem lies with me...  I struggle to function to the best of my abilities when I'm tired.  Standards slip when it comes to everything as I wouldn't necessarily have the energy to give things my best focus.  Just the other day, after a 5am rising with madam, I had to go to work which I found very stressful as the child I work with was extremely frustrated with not being mobile, so took it out on my hands using her nails.  I then had to go collect Munchkin from school and go to the local book shop to get some stationary and books that Yani needed for school.  We went up to the top floor to buy the books and then came downstairs to look at the puzzles for madam.  Being tired, I looked at a box and when I looked down... she was gone!  Oh no, where is she... theres a door that opens out onto the street... panic.... I start shouting her name over and over hoping she's going to answer me.  Next thing, a counter staff girl shouted over "I think she just went up in the lift"!  Great!!  I run up the stairs and find her on the upper level.  I got angry, really angry...  Not with her, but with myself for letting my guard down and letting her give me the slip!  Even if I'm exhausted, I cannot let the guard down!

Time for action... I can no longer function as a law abiding, kind, happy, intellegent, useful member of society without my 8 hours a night. I have discovered the frightening "Sleep Deprived Driving" which means I can be often seen having a catnap at the side of the road when can drive no further... When I was younger, they used to joke that if sleeping was an Olympic Event, I'd bring the gold home for Ireland every time.  I LOVED my sleep.I had it down to a fine art, and could sleep standing upright on the 75 bus to work every morning.  Gawd, I miss those days!  So whats my plan of action....

I have in my possession now, the holy scroll (well GMS prescription for Melatonin liquid)  I have previously bought Melatonin over the internet and given it in small doses but that obviously didn't have the desired effect.  The paediatrician gave me clear instructions and the dose she recommended is far greater that the amount I had been giving her.  So fingers crossed everyone... If it does the job you will probably hear the squeals of delight coming from me in the morning :)

Watch this space.... but if you hear snoring, wake me at your own peril hehe...